Let it be fucking obvious

I used to practice indifference.
Cross my legs.
Let the phone ring.
Keep every bright, embarrassing want
behind my eyes.

Tonight, rain blows through the screen.
My dress clings to the backs of my knees.
I have dragged the good chair
onto the porch
to watch the weather break.

And yes.
I wish you were here.

Look at that
the world still standing
after I say it.

Somewhere, a gutter comes loose.
Water beats the hydrangeas flat.
I uncross my legs.
Let the wet reach me.

I have spent whole evenings
pretending the doorway was empty
while you stood in it.

What a waste
of a perfectly good pulse.

If you come over,
come close.
There is rain in my hair
and something I want to tell you
without arranging my face first.

I’m tired of going home
with every word still in me.

Tonight I leave the porch light on.
Sit where you can see me.

Let it be fucking obvious.